Saturday, May 31, 2008

floor pretzels

My snack at work yesterday was a plastic container full of floor pretzels. They were okay. They started out in life as pretzels, but when I dropped them on the floor Thursday night they became floor pretzels. Now some people would have said 'Enough!' when those pretzels hit the floor. Not me. I buy pretzels maybe four times a year. And those four times a year, pretzels are the best things in the world. So after enjoying some pretzels from a freshly-opened bag Thursday night, I was both shocked and dismayed when the bag itself betrayed me and a goodly portion of pretzels hit the floor.

After getting over the initial shock, I grabbed a tupperware container and dropped to my knees and began to scoop them up, deciding then and there they would be my Friday work snack. "If you think I'm going to let these good pretzels go to waste," I said to no one in particular, "you're crazy."

So that's what I did. And as I said, they were quite good. I'm thinking maybe keeping some floor pretzels around might not be a bad idea. We could break them out if guests we weren't fond of happened to stop by some night.

"Care for some floor pretzels?"

"What?"

"MORE pretzels. Would you like more pretzels?"

"But we haven't had any pretzels."

"Exactly. Then these would be more, wouldn't they?"

It's worth considering.

Song for the day -- 'She's Electric' by Oasis. It's something of a throwaway tune, but you have to have a few of those around too, don't you?

I know I do.

9 Comments:

Blogger Voix said...

Speak more of this "betrayal by bag" so the rest of us can avoid it!

5:41 AM  
Blogger Citizen said...

For surely. Basically, I was carrying the bag back into the kitchen by the torn corner of the bag -- not wise, I know. Apparently, I was a bit overzealous opening the bag because that corner ripped little by little as I was walking, leading to The Big Spill (as it's referred to around our house).

6:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Note to self: Do not eat pretzels at future parties at Dan's house.

11:50 AM  
Blogger Missy said...

I like that song. And I would have scooped up those pretzels too!

7:41 PM  
Blogger Missy said...

The big spill! Ha! Sounds like a sequel to The Big (grocery) Bill or the Big Chill.

7:42 PM  
Blogger Citizen said...

Dave, I'd never serve you floor pretzels. It wouldn't happen!

If I were you, I'd be a lot more concerned about the leather hood. :-)

10:16 AM  
Blogger Citizen said...

They were too good to go to waste, Missy. And I'm not proud.

You could go so far to say I have no pride.

A sequel to The Big Chill, eh? Hm. Well, if we're going to do it, I say we tie it into the environment. Maybe it's about global warming. 'The Big Melt..'

I'd like to see Kevin Kline get out of that one!!

10:24 AM  
Blogger Missy said...

Oh Dan! Yesterday I spilled a box of crackers and Todd was all "Just scoop 'em up into a baggy." He had not read your blog. Is this a Hamline thing?

8:04 PM  
Blogger Citizen said...

They did stress frugality, Missy. Creativity and frugality. They weren't so big on hygiene and good health. They were kind of laissez-faire, as far as that.

5:48 PM  

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